By now many of you have probably seen the movie (or at least the movie trailer), "No Strings Attached", a story about no-strings-attached sex between two friends. Ashton Kutcher is Natalie Portman's pal, and they have an arrangement to get together whenever the need arises and "use each other" for sex. And we know the formula: they end up falling for each other, and the meaningless sex turns into true, forever, happily-after love.
Though the premise attempts to redeem itself, the message is quite misleading, and sadly, there are many people out there that will unwittingly believe that such a relationship could truly become reality. Unfortunately, the message will also translate differently for a woman than for a man. Women will think along romantic notions (sighs and butterflies), and men will think they this is the best arrangement ever (playah!) - both will end up with nothing but fool's gold.
I realize that I am ranting about a movie, but let's face it - we can get caught up in the fantasy of movies. I read an article some time ago which postulated that women's ideas about men and romance might be heavily predicated by what the movies portray - consciously or unconsciously. Whether or not there is some truth in that, it is rather disconcerting to see movies like "No Strings Attached" playing up the "positives" of an otherwise no-win romantic situation. There is nothing redemptive about the "no strings attached" concept, in romance, in business, in life!
Unfortunately, real life does not play like out like the "No Strings Attached" premise. We're not in Kansas anymore - someone's heart will be broken. Rarely will the "bad boy" be reformed by the "good-girl-next-door", true love will not materialize after a heated night of passion, nor will the rich heir to a fortune throw his inheritance away just because he falls hard for the poor servant. Fairy tales are just that - they make our hearts swell, as we cheer the underdog. But let's not subconsciously think that life can somehow mirror what we see on the big screen - not even an iota.
Ladies, value and esteem yourselves! Becoming a "mean girl" or thinking that the "Ugly Truth" will morph into something "sweet" and "cute" is not endearing in the real world. Guys, you can be strong and masculine, and espouse honor and integrity. Bad behavior a la "Jersey Shores" or "Housewives" is totally NOT cool! No matter how entertaining to watch on TV.
Being a "no strings attached" person is shallow and non-committal. No personal relationship, business, project, or career can survive and thrive with such a life-view. A life worth having is fully committed in all facets: love, relationships, work, and business. It's the stuff that fulfilled dreams and sweet successes. You gotta be all in, otherwise don't play at all.